The Secrets of a Lady tj-1 Page 8

  “I’m glad, my friend. But I’m sorry you couldn’t find anything in Ellison’s residence,” she said with a soft sigh. “I’d hoped we could finish this assignment quickly. Even more so now that you’re in danger. You’ll find the English have as little love for you as the French, I’m afraid.”

  With a frown, Jean nodded. “That is why it is good that I have a passable English accent. Don’t I?”

  Audrey giggled at Jean’s attempt at a British accent and nodded. “It’s almost as good as Noah’s French accent.”

  Jean’s face fell into a teasing scowl. “Your brother can capture none of the subtle nuances or beauty of my people’s speech. He sounds like he is strangling a cat!”

  Audrey’s giggle turned to a full-bore belly laugh. Jean was right, when Noah was alone with them his French accent was deplorable. Only under the pressure of an assignment could he manage it properly.

  “I won’t tell him you said that.” She glanced around, pretending she was checking for her brother. “Nor will I tell him I agree with you.”

  Jean stared at her for a long moment, his eyes drifting over her face with affection. “Tell me again, why you will not marry me.”

  Freezing, Audrey stood and paced away to the fireplace. In France, Jean had asked her to marry him several times, despite her gentle refusal each time.

  “Oh Jean, you already know the reasons why,” she said as she plucked at her sleeve.

  “Tell me again,” he ordered with a smile in his tone. “I cannot remember them.”

  “Liar.” She laughed, despite how uncomfortable the conversation made her. “I won’t marry you because neither of us loves the other.”

  “That is not true,” Jean insisted, standing up to come closer to her. “I care for you a great deal and respect you even more, which is better than most marriages. I find you attractive. What could be a better match than that?”

  Audrey shook her head. “One of us or both of us would only end up hurt if we married. No, I won’t marry unless I love the man and he loves me equally. And that is not our relationship, Jean.”

  She paused as an image of Griffin leapt to her mind. When she spoke again, her words were soft. “I know what it’s like to love someone who doesn’t love you in return. I couldn’t go through that again. Or be the one who caused such pain.”

  Jean gave a theatrical sigh. “Alas, I feared your thoughts on that subject remained unchanged.”

  “Jean.” She stepped closer and smiled up at him. “I am glad you’re here. I’m glad you’ll be helping us, even if we cannot work as closely together as we have in the past.”

  He grinned in reply and she kissed him, first on one cheek, then the other.

  The slam of the door beside them made them each leap back. Jean took a fighter’s stance, while Audrey spun around to face their intruder.

  Griffin stood framed in the doorway.

  He looked furious, his eyes flashing and his face darkening redder with every moment that passed. She’d never seen him so angry, even when he’d overheard Ellison had kissed her in the carriage. Now he looked ready to kill.

  “This is what you do to occupy your mind while you wait for your brother and me to return?” His voice was choked and tight.

  She winced while she took a step forward and held out her hand to explain.

  With a growl, he backed away and looked at her with eyes full of disgust. “Don’t let me interrupt you. You and your lover are free to carry on, though I’d appreciate it if you took your little tryst upstairs. The servants could wander in at any time and I would be embarrassed for them to see such a display.”

  Turning on his heel, he stormed out of the room. Audrey opened her mouth to call out after him, but couldn’t seem to make a sound as she watched him disappear from sight. For a long moment she simply stared at the empty doorway where he’d stood, then gathered her rapidly crumbling composure.

  “I’m so sorry, Jean,” she whispered as she turned back. “That was our host, Griffin Berenger. He’s an old family friend and is helping us with this case. He doesn’t understand…” She trailed off as a tear began to wind its way down her cheek to her chin.

  Clucking his tongue, Jean pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and offered it to her. She took it gladly. Wiping her eyes, she cursed herself for such a weak display in front of a man who had lost so much.

  “I think he is more than a family friend, no?” Jean asked sympathetically. “Perhaps this man is the reason you have always said no when I asked you for your hand?”

  “No,” Audrey denied even as the sting of truth cut through her heart. “He can only ever be a family friend. He’s made that abundantly clear to me.”

  Jean smiled, a bemused expression that made her suddenly feel young and inexperienced. “Dear, sweet Audrey. These are not the actions of a simple friend. That was a man who thinks something has been taken that should be his. But for now, dry your tears. I am not offended by his outburst.”

  “Well, I am!” She bunched the handkerchief into a ball as her embarrassment transformed turned to anger.

  “Then go and tell him so,” Jean said with a shrug. “See how he reacts and perhaps you will see that I am right. Either way, I must go. I have stayed too long and your friend has seen me.”

  Audrey nodded. “Would you like me to sneak you out the front?”

  “No.” Jean opened the window and climbed out on the ledge. “I will go the way I came. Good night, fair Audrey. Adieu.”

  “Adieu, my friend,” she whispered as she shut the window.

  With a harsh sigh, she turned to the doorway. It might take all her energy, but she and Griffin Berenger were going to have it out, once and for all.

  Chapter Eight

  Griffin downed a second drink and stared at the fire crackling in his bedroom. Rage and jealousy coursed through him and he hated himself for both. Once again he had been knocked from his orderly existence by a woman.

  Audrey in the arms of another man was just too much to contemplate. It was bad enough with Ellison, but he could console himself with the knowledge that her relationship with his neighbor was only part of her job. But the man who had been holding her in Griffin’s sitting room was something very different.

  Something personal.

  How many years ago had it been that he’d stumbled upon Luci and one of her paramours in that very same sitting room? Three? The memory still stung like it was yesterday.

  He’d come home early from a meeting with one of his solicitors to be told his wife was entertaining in the sitting room. Though the servants had made a kind attempt to divert his attention, he’d gone in anyway, anxious to see Luci and speak to her about his day.

  He had found her curled up on the settee in the lap of a young merchant. They’d broken their kiss the instant he entered, the young man apologizing as he tried to find the nearest exit. Griffin had let him escape with only a well-blackened eye and a promise never to return or tell stories.

  His wife had watched it all with a bemused smile. She’d never risen in fear or tried to explain her actions. Even after the man was gone and Griffin towered over her, demanding an explanation, she had only laughed. She’d actually laughed.

  What I do is my business, Griffin.

  He’d been so shocked and horrified by her matter-of-fact attitude that he hadn’t been able to say anything. It had been the beginning of the end of their marriage. The beginning of pain that had only grown as he uncovered more and more of her deceptions.

  “Who do you think you are, speaking to me in such a fashion?”

  Griffin turned, startled from his thoughts as Audrey barged into his bedroom uninvited and slammed the door behind her. Her eyes were full of passionate anger. Despite all his conflicted emotions, Griffin couldn’t seem to control the curl of desire in the pit of his stomach.

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about, Griffin!” she continued without letting him answer her first question. “You have no idea who Jean is or why he was
here. How dare you accuse me of trading my virtue twice in one week.”

  Recovering from his surprise, Griffin snapped, “Well, you must admit I have reason to think so. This is the third man you have kissed in a week. That I know of.”

  He wished he could take his cold words back the instant they were said. Especially when Audrey’s face twisted in horror and her eyes filled with tears, which she blinked away.

  Her anger erupted to the surface to wash away the hurt.

  “Douglas Ellison kissed me. I wanted nothing to do with his vile touch, but I allowed it so he wouldn’t become suspicious of my true motives. Trust that I will not put myself in a situation where he can repeat that action.”

  He had to admit Audrey was magnificent in her rage. Her eyes sparkled with azure fire, her skin glowed with a pink flush, and her breasts lifted up and down in an alluring fashion as she drew in harsh breaths of air between tirades.

  “As for you…” Her voice lowered a fraction as a blush colored her cheeks. “What happened between us was a mutual… mistake. I thought we agreed upon that at breakfast. And you apologized to me, so don’t you dare pretend that it was all my doing.”

  Griffin’s heart sank with regret. It hadn’t been fair to blame her for his astonishing lack of self-control. Still, he tried to remain focused.

  “And what of this newest man, Audrey? Why were you exchanging kisses with him in my sitting room?”

  Her nostrils flared slightly and for a moment she didn’t answer, as if she were trying to rein in her emotions enough to find words.

  “Jean Beaumonte is a friend to me, nothing more. I was simply saying goodbye to him in the fashion of his country, with two brief kisses, one on each cheek. I feel nothing for the man beyond a deep and very friendly affection, and powerful gratitude for all he has sacrificed for me and for our country.” Her low, furious tone made him feel like a schoolboy who’d been put down by his governess.

  He watched her pace over to the window to look down at the street below.

  For the first time he realized what a position they were in. She was standing in his bedroom, just feet away from his bed, in fact. And they were arguing as passionately as he would have liked to be making love to her.

  “This Beaumonte was a spy then?” he asked in an attempt to clear those thoughts from his mind.

  “Yes.” Her voice dropped another level, as if breaking visual contact with him allowed her a measure of calm. “Jean was our contact when Noah and I did business in France.”

  Griffin wrinkled his brow. “So he spied on his own country? The man is a traitor.”

  The way she spun on her heel told him he had crossed a very thin line into dangerous territory. “Is that what you think, Griffin? Well, if that is true, then Jean Beaumonte has already paid dearly for his ‘crime’. He has no family left, no money. He’s been revealed as a spy and is no longer welcome in his own country, yet ours is little better because he is a Frenchman visiting us directly after we conquered his emperor. He rescued me, and that’s something I’ll never forget, no matter what you say.”

  Griffin paused. Curiosity overwhelmed any remaining frustration in him, and he took a step closer, leaving only a foot of space between them. Audrey drew in a short breath at his movement, as if she were finally becoming aware of where they were, but she didn’t move away from him.

  “How did he save you?” he asked softly.

  She held his gaze. “He rescued me from a man who wished to steal the virtue you think I give so freely.”

  Griffin closed his eyes with a soft groan. In his anger, he’d made an erroneous assumption about the woman before him.

  “I’m so sorry.” He opened his eyes to reach out to her hand. She allowed him to take it without resistance.

  “You haven’t truly known me for many years, Griffin Berenger,” she whispered, rubbing her thumb across the sensitive webbing between his thumb and forefinger and sending a shock of awareness through his veins. “Please don’t assume you do just because we’ve shared two kisses.”

  Griffin smiled down at her, unable to resist when the room was getting hotter and beginning to spin around them. Not when she was staring back up at him with eyes he longed to lose himself in.

  “Three.”

  “Three?”

  “Three kisses.” He dipped his head to brush his lips against hers.

  She made a soft sound of surprise at the back of her throat that quickly dissolved into a moan of pleasure. She wrapped her arms around his neck and returned his kiss, teasing him with her darting tongue until he crushed her against his chest. He filled his senses with the way she felt, tasted, smelled, intent on imprinting her impression on him.

  “I think,” she gasped, breathless as he moved his lips from her mouth to the curve of her jaw and then the delicate skin of her throat. “You were jealous of Jean.”

  He lifted his eyes with a smile. “Jealous?” he repeated. “Perhaps a little.”

  Moving her toward the bed until her back came in contact with the wooden bedpost, he continued his assault on her mouth while he allowed his hands to explore. Starting with her shoulders, he slid trembling fingers down her sides, just grazing the curve of her breasts.

  Ignoring her gasp of surprise, he trailed them down her waist to her hips. Once there, he grasped the smooth curve and pulled her up closer against him so she would be certain how much he wanted her.

  A second gasp was Audrey’s response as her thigh came in contact with something hard beneath Griffin’s breeches. She knew from her conversations with Hannah that this was the proof of a man’s desire. The feel of it startled, but also intrigued her.

  Though her mother hadn’t had ‘the wedding night talk’ with her, Audrey did have an idea about how the joining between a man and woman worked. She’d always considered the sex act to be a bit strange, but the way Griffin made her feel… If making love to him would leave her even a fraction as breathless and hot as she felt at the moment, perhaps it wasn’t something she’d mind experiencing.

  Griffin’s hands came up to wrap around the bedpost behind her, trapping her in his embrace, though she felt no need to escape. In fact, she welcomed his touch. It was like living a dream.

  With his arms up, she could see every line and contour of his chest straining against his white cotton shirt. He was broad, proportioned just right for his muscular shoulders and long legs. With trembling hands, she unlaced her fingers from behind his head and slowly repeated his earlier action, dragging the digits down his chest. The muscles bunched beneath her touch, tightening as his pupils dilated with desire.

  “Oh, Griffin,” she sighed, leaning up to kiss him again. But instead of returning her kiss, he suddenly stiffened, backing away from her a step as he shook his head.

  “I’m going to stop now.” His voice was gentle as he released the bedpost to take her hands in his.

  “Why?” Confused tears stung her eyes as she realized she was to be rejected yet again.

  “Because if I don’t now, I won’t be able to.” He touched her cheek with the back of his hand.

  She closed her eyes at the gentle caress, her desire flaming once more. “What if I don’t want you to stop?”

  His jagged breath made her eyes fly open and she watched as he took another step away.

  “You think you don’t now, but later you’d hate me. And I would hate myself.”

  She turned her head as the heat of desire turned to humiliation. “I understand.”

  Yes, she understood perfectly. All this kissing and desire was some kind of reaction to six months of loneliness. He didn’t want her, he wanted a warm body in his bed. And when he thought of the consequences to that body being hers, he backed away.

  “I don’t think you do understand.”

  An awkward silence slammed between them like a steel door. Audrey fidgeted in her spot for a moment, trying to regain some of the confidence the past five years had given her. If only she could change the subject, perhaps she would rememb
er how strong that time had made her.

  “How did the dinner go then?” The slight tremor in her voice made her wince.

  Ducking his head, Griffin shrugged one shoulder, evidence that he was as uncomfortable with their current situation as she was. “It went well enough. Ellison was his usual preening self, but he didn’t reveal anything of use to your case.”

  “And where is Noah?” she asked as she slowly edged away from the bed toward the door. When she’d been angry, going into Griffin’s room hadn’t seemed like an outrageous thing to do. Once he started touching her, she hadn’t cared where they were as long as he was holding her. But now, rejected and embarrassed, she realized just how compromised she was.

  Still, she couldn’t help but peer around the room, curious about Griffin’s private life. The chamber was strangely sparse, the only ornate piece of furniture was the large four-poster bed facing the fire. The rest of the pieces were plain and small, almost as if they didn’t fit in the enormous room. A door led off to her right and another to her left. One probably led to Griffin’s sitting room or study and the other to Luci’s bedroom.

  With a shiver, Audrey turned her face down to stare at the wood flooring. The last thing she wanted to do was think of Luci’s bed, Luci’s room, Luci’s life in this house.

  “Noah went off to put a bit of pressure on a lovely widow who he thought might have some information,” Griffin answered with a flash of a grin that brought her back to reality.

  “Oh, good Lord,” Audrey laughed as the tension eased out of her body at her brother’s latest, predictable antics. “He never misses an opportunity, does he?”

  Griffin frowned. “Did your brother often leave you alone on missions?”

  She smiled sadly. “I suppose he did it often enough over the years. I expected it, for there were places only he could go. I always had Hannah to protect me and keep me company.”